Oh Miss Mary

This is an article I wrote for the corps paper.

Cedar 7 pulls up to Miss Mary’s home during the first week in Louisiana. The lot basically resembles a glorified junk yard made up of a decrepit house (the reason we were there), tin panels surrounding her whole acre (to prevent forest fires?), and 12 cats. Filled with curiosity, Cedar 7 approaches the back door, eager to meet Miss Mary…and the cats. An 82 year old woman with the mouth of a sailor and the endurance of a 24 year old, Cedar 7 appreciates her greatly, especially her potty mouth. We also appreciate her unloading her guns for us. The guns are to scare off the “pill head boys” who come in her yard and mess with the cats.
We were asked to clear up debris. As we are peeling this debris, layer by layer were received our first batch of authentic Louisiana culture; the bugs. Termites, ants, spiders, millipedes, centipedes, and a scorpion! Kevin, our sponsor, explained to us that these bugs are called “tai tai’s.” While working, Miss Mary is constantly screaming from her window telling us she would grab her “poison” if we wanted to kill the bugs. We politely refrained. In the midst of screaming at us in her Louisiana Creole accent, Miss Mary screams, “Michael! Get off my husband’s grave!” Apparently she buried her husband in her front year some years earlier. Creepy?
The next morning, Miss Mary asked Michael to fix the electricity because she has a lot of lead in her. “Oh yeah is there a lot of lead in the water?” asked Michael.
“No! When I was 17 my husband stabbed me and the lead is still lingering!” Michael smiled awkwardly and continued working.
This woman is full of surprises and the best thing Louisiana has brought us yet! Despite her outlandish stories and threats with guns, Miss Mary is a dime in dozen and a hoot to work for.